Pursuing Conflict in Marriage with Mike Adams

Community Conflict Marriage Men's Roundtable Mrt

Pursuing Conflict in Marriage with Mike Adams

Chris Rivers

In season one, episode five, Chris Rivers, Daniel Black, and Mike Adams, a member of Grace Church's Spartanburg campus, discuss conflict in marriage, personalities, and how they manifest passivity. They also address the role of community in navigating marital conflict.

Download Episode 5 Study Questions and then share, listen, and discuss in a one on one conversation or with a group of men.

APPLICATION

  • Mike shared how his Type A personality caused him to be passive in his relationships and lacking in empathy. What aspects of your personality cause you to lean more towards passivity? How does passivity manifest itself in your life?
  • How do the personality differences between you and your spouse lead to conflict in your marriage?
  • Have you ever sought out biblical community to address problems in your marriage? What could be the possible benefits of this type of vulnerability?
  • Read 2 Timothy 1:7 and Galatians 6:2. How do these Scriptures speak to the importance of biblical community and vulnerability? What are some ways you can choose to reject passivity and move towards responsibility in your marriage?

KEY POINTS

  • Typically, passivity is associated with timidity, avoiding responsibility, or simply having a “laid back” personality. Mike explains how passivity manifested itself in his life as a Type A personality. His assertiveness, desire for control and power, and need to give direction caused him to be passive in the way he related to people. This often led him to be insensitive to others’ feelings and lacking in empathy.
  • The personality differences between Mike and his wife and his strong desire for control led to conflicts early in their marriage. Over time, Mike learned the importance of inviting his wife’s perspective into situations and giving validity to her suggestions and preferences.
  • The role of community was integral to growth in their marriage. As they experienced patterns of conflict and increased divisiveness in their relationship, Mike sought out help from a couple in their church. They helped mediate the conflict between Mike and his wife and gave perspective on the situation.
  • Making the decision to invite another couple into their lives and relationship involved a high degree of vulnerability. There is always some level of fear when you expose your weaknesses and are willing to be honest about your struggles. However, Mike saw this as an opportunity to reject passivity and move towards growth in his marriage and his relationship with God.

SCRIPTURE REFERENCES

  • For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline. 2 Timothy 1:7
  • Share each other’s burdens, and in this way obey the law of Christ. Galatians 6:2

RESOURCES

A Man and His Wife Study mention: This teaching can be found at: gracechurchsc.org/mrt

Biblical Femininity Study mention: This teaching can be found at: gracechurchsc.org/ezer

Join a Men’s Roundtable study by finding a campus near you and register for Authentic Manhood at: gracechurchsc.org/mrt

If you know a man who would benefit from hearing this episode, share it with him. Having intentional conversations around these principles is a great way to disciple and help others move towards Christ and the Church.

Have questions or want us to discuss a topic? Email us at menatgrace@gracechurchsc.org.